I remember very vividly, how it felt to sit in the Omnimax theatre at the Science Centre and watch Beauty and the Beast. The grandeur.

We were only 13, Bay and I, and we were moved. The feeling's ineffable. You'd understand if you were there. When the movie first came on, we had to turn our heads slightly left and right in order to see the whole screen. I will never forget the experience. And it means so much more that Bay and I are such good friends today. Best friends.

For you who love the Disney animation as much as I do, and can't help but start to tear when Beast fades in Belle's arms.

For those who've asked, my birthday wishlist:

- Agnes B. dog tags (The glittery ones. Always wanted one of those. Haha.)

- Small Bag (Just big enough to fit my wallet, my phone, and maybe some make-up. Friends, you know the sizes of the kinds of bags I carry, and they're way too big when all I have in there is what I just mentioned.)

- Clutch (Never owned one.)

- Top (? Hahaha. I really don't know. Something slightly nicer than my usual plain white tee?)

- Chanel 2.55! (Hahaha. Ok, I'm kidding. Actually, no. But, yes.)

- Nokia E71 (Sighh. Ok, yes. Something more realistic.)

- Nice trench coat for winter (I'm desperate cos I don't have the time to shop and the weather's getting colder by the day.)

Alrighty, back to work again.

We embrace the emptiness of La Trobe at midnight on a Sunday. It was a very good evening. We were productive at work too:

Well, at least I was, whilst the rest (ok, they did work too. I just did more. HEH) mocked my assets with my camera and the power of perspective on their side. I'm the incarnation of an aeroplane runway and I'm proud of it. Pinchy pinchy! Hahaha!

The brainchild of a few culinary adventurers! A temporary bar that apparently offers breathable gin and tonic to it's patrons! OMFG!!! So damn exciting! I hope they bring it to Melbourne. Or Singapore!! And the best part is, it's only $7/hour!!!! Ok, this's in London, but I reckon I'd even pay like $20/hour to get drunk off the air! Like, WOULDN'T YOU!?? They even provide you with protective suits so you don't smell like you just took a dip in a gin pool. Brilliant!! :D

Ok, I'm suppose to be doing work right now. But it's Friday night, n I honestly can't bring myself to think about ethnic identities and multicultural states. Or draw another page of lines and circles. Or listen to another second of my interview. Or flip open my reader. This is very bad. I need to finish my work. But I need to start first. :(

My parents chose a bad time to come. I chose a bad time to have a birthday. WOE.

My brother once said to me, "Val, I think you bring out the worst in people."

Deplorable to say, I'm afraid it's true. Take my first actual boyfriend for example. At first, I made him wanna be a better person. Unintentionally and unknowing on my part, he apparently found inspiration to tame his temper and adopt the virtue of being understanding. But that didn't last for long. Over time, what he innately was started to surface and before you know it, he became worst than he had ever become. And this was, on my part, also unintentional. To be fair, I lost bits of my pride, my dignity, and a whole of 10kg.

Take all those I dated there after. They eventually either went slightly psycho or did/said things that were illogical, irrational, and sometimes, unreasonable.

Not once has someone that has come into intimate contact with me changed to become say; more focused in life, or discover what it is to be understanding, or mellow down, or found passion to pursue something big picture-ish...

So yes, that's the sad truth I've now come to terms with. Not only do I extend hurt and sadness, I bring along with me an infliction of terrible change. And no, this doesn't not make me the winner nor the last one standing between me and him. Honestly, it's more painful for me than it may come across.

D and I called it off. Logically, I cannot think of a more right thing to do. But speaking from the very pit of my heart, I don't know if it is. I miss him, I do. And I wonder whether we can ever regain that friendship we once had. I hope he never alters his moral values and sticks by them. Hopefully. Maybe.

Back to my amazingly atrocious ability in causing people to behave with no sense of thought, I think for the better of you, you should all stay away from me.

*Sigh. What an Easter.

Time for work.

Words can't describe, the loss my family suffers. The loss I suffer. No longer will I be greeted with wagging tails when I step into the house. Not even 1. I hope you're in a better place, Niks. And I hope you're still doing well, Ash. I love you both. My love. My family.

I wish I was a star so I could glow as Yvaine does. I think it's absolutely adorable how she would start to shine whenever she was close to Tristan. And how she described love as the only thing that made it bearable to keep watching mankind.

My faith in undying, unconditional love has been renewed. And I'm guessing it'll last till I wake up in the morning.

Speaking of waking up in the morning, I'd be waking up to my first day of Easter Break. What a hoot. Well, not really. We made a housemate pack to clean up the place tmr, and the only part I look forward to is seeing my bath tub clean. Aside from the spot where we stand to shower, the rest of the bath tub pretty much hasn't been touched since the first time we moved in some 8 weeks ago, when we did our first spring cleaning. So you could imagine. Eck.

Well well, this weekend's the housewarming weekend. Tonnes of stuff to do. Not entirely excited cos I'm more bothered about what's gonna happen after the party. When I gotta plough my way through my house and try and clean up the rubble of what's left of the place. I think I'm old and boring. And dried up. No fun. I need to find my fun back.

I hope I complete 3 of my assignments by the end of the break too. I hope hope hope.

So I have to concede to the once mythical belief. Camberwell is most absolutely worth the painful crawling out of bed at 8am on a Sunday morning. A picture of all my buys save 1 white nightie slip-on which was already in the wash at that time. Next time, I'm bringing a bigger bag. Bigger for more! :)

In the time we were rummaging through the many stalls, it went from cold to chilly and rainy to hot and sunny to rainy again and hot then back to cold. Men. You think your women are erratic and temperamental, well you haven't met Melbourne's weather.

Regardless of my totally amazing buys by the means of my unwavering determination to purchase as much for as little possible, retail therapy hasn't exactly shed much effect on me.

Sigh, the matters of the heart are never easy as pie. I wish Niks was still around to give me that silently thoughtful canine comfort.

My heart aches with frustration, hurt and from a huge empty pit where Nika used to fill.

Cool! My brand new site. :) You shall do me proud.